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Dinofest

Three good-looking teenage dinosaurs frozen in time over 65 million years ago together with their mic, geetars and dwums. Sounds unlikely? Impossible even?

Well think again, ‘cos we is gonna tell you a story about DINOFEST, our latest amazin’ raisin, New-For-2019 attraction at Tenby Dinosaur Park (almost certainly the top dinosaur park on planet earth) that will almost certainly blow your minds.

DINOFEST, you see, was originally just a huge lump of amber that Simon, one of the big Park owners (we may 'av mentioned that a few times before) had spotted on the Sunday morning car boot stall, over at Carew there, of old Mrs Jenkins. Mrs J is there every Sunday. Has been since 1907. Loves it and has always got all sorts on her tables, bits and bobs, interesting curios…well, rubbish really, if we’re being perfectly honest, absolute garbage. Never sells so much as a button.

Except this time, Simon, who was there on the look out for a CD by 90s pop princess Cathy Dennis, happened to notice the massive lump of amber that old Mrs Jenkins says was put through her letterbox one day with junk mail, but which Simon eventually discovered (after plying Mrs J with liberal shots of rum from his hip flask and listening to endless stories about her cross stitch club) was dug up in her back garden along with an unexploded Second World War bomb and a signed photo of the great Archimedes...

Well, (to make a long story slightly shorter) by using the latest cutting-edge scientific techniques together with a whole lot of love, our nerdy scientists at our state-of-the-art TDP laboratory worked night and day to extract what was inside the amber, eventually shocked to their boots when they discovered the three boys…’er, the teenage dinosaurs with their instruments.

Following extensive medical attention, one packet of Ibuprofen and a few hot cups of tea, the three boys…’er, teenage dinos made a full recovery and were so grateful to be breathing fresh sea air once again, they promised to make their home at The Park forever and play for all our lovely customers LIVE EVERY SINGLE DAY!

They can’t believe their luck.
We can’t believe our luck.
You surely cannot believe YOUR luck.

So you can return your tickets right now to the silly Glastonbury or Reading Festivals, or, indeed, any of the other millions of festivals that every city, town, village or small cluster of houses in the middle of nowhere right across the land seem to feel the need to put on every summer, safe in the knowledge that you can daily enjoy the greatest band that has ever existed on planet earth.

And not only the greatest band either.

The actual, undisputed (unless someone else finds an older lump of amber)(but what are the chances of that?)(you never know, mind, with that Mrs Jenkins) inventors of rock n roll.

Course, everyone USED to say it was Elvis who invented it. Others would opine that Shirley it must have beeen Rod Stewart, admittedly a good guess since he has been crooning now for at least 250 years, only ten less than Keith Richards.

But if you’re a Tenby Dinosaur Park fan you can put your tongue smugly in your cheek secure in the knowledge that whatever anyone tells you, and whether you’re a fan of Beyonce, The Smiths, Abba, Happy Mondays, Val Doonican, New Order or Iceland’s The Sugarcubes, rock n roll and pop music can be traced all the way back to its inventors: dinosaurs, specifically the three Chinese teenage dinosaurs who formed Dinofest over 65 million years ago, in far away, ching chong, Chongqing China, where they played a primitive form of rock and roll with guitars made from balsa wood, papier mache and horse hair and drums fashioned from…well, you get the picture.

How amazing is that then?

VERY, obviously!

Daft question really.
So if you are a Tenby Dinosaur Park fan, the next time someone says China invented fireworks and paper, the complex internal martial art of Ba Gua, acupuncture and herbal medicine (not to mention moxibustion), silk, an incredible system of writing, is the home of Taoism and qigong, and was the home of the Boxer Rebellion and Chairman Mao (though perhaps best not mention that old…’er, old Mao, come to think of it), you can calmly trump them by announcing how The Middle Kingdom also invented rock n roll and pop music thru three teenage sensations (and dinosaurs), called DINOFEST over 65 million years ago.

So there!

DINOFEST and the summer of love.
Exclusively at Tenby Dinosaur Park.
2019.
AND FOREVER.