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Dinosaur-Themed Toddlers' Playground

Now, who fancies a little bit of rough and tumble on our cute little Dinosaur-Themed Toddlers' Playground?

We said 'TODDLERS' Playground'. That means toddlers ONLY! NO ADULTS WHATSOEVER! Got it?!

Yes, yes, we know just the sight of the playground brings out the toddler in all of us. And we know that reverting to toddler-hood even for a few minutes is good for you...
Brings out the finer side of one's nature. Encourages one's creativity and all that type of thing.

Trouble is, the sort of 'toddler' you're gassing on about is engulfed in a big boofy ole adult's body. There just ain't no easy way to say it, people. It's just what happens over time.

TIME AND TODDLER'S DINOSAUR-THEMED PLAYGROUNDS WAIT FOR NO MAN (OR WOMAN). LOOK IN THE MIRROR ONCE IN A WHILE, WHY DON'T YOU?

And there ain't no easy way to say this neither: our highly trained security guards, Anton and Dwayne, are also adults, and have extremely big, boofy and muscular adult bodies, that have both seen a fair bit of hair-raising hand-to-hand combat in boxing rings, in war zones, outside nightclubs at 3 in the a.m. and (most impressive of all) in handling the weekly bother when it ALL kicks orf at Ladies' Bingo Evening down the old Astoria in Milford Haven.

NEED WE SAY MORE? WE THINK NOT.

So all you toddlers out there: come and play to your heart's content in our D-T TP (Dinosaur-Themed Toddlers' Playground).

All you adults: "Move away from the D-T TP (Dinosaur-Themed Toddlers' Playround), we repeat: "move away from the D-T TP."

Thank you for your co-operation in this matter at this time.